zolac_no_miko: (some say his first name is The)
HIS NAME IS OLIVER!

If you are a Top Gear fan, I don't need to explain myself. For the rest of you, this is my car's namesake:



That's the original Oliver, a tiny adorable 1963 Opel Kadett A, pictured with his human, tiny adorable Richard Hammond. Why do I want to name my car Oliver?

-Oliver is the happiest car in the world.

-Richard bought this car used, in Africa, for less than 1,500 pounds, and drove it across Botswana, a distance of 1,000 miles. This journey included the crossing of the Makgadikgadi Pan, a massive salt pan larger than Switzerland, the surface of which is a thin crust over a gooey mud-like substance. Jeremy and James had to completely rip apart their cars until they were light enough to struggle across. Richard refused to harm his beloved Oliver; luckily Oliver was light enough to skip across the salt pans without any trouble anyway.

-When James and Jezzers' cars were struggling and breaking down and requiring repairs and modifications, Oliver blithely soldiered on, refusing to stop, even when this happened:



-When I am a famous celebrity and come on the show to be the Star in the Reasonably Priced Car, this will make an awesome story in my interview.

-ALL ADDERS ARE PUFFS.

In sum: tiny, adorable, happiest car in the world, never stops running even after being dragged over 1,000 miles of African wilderness, drowned, and shot, THESE ARE QUALITIES I WANT FOR MY VEHICLE.

*brb ordering Stig bumper sticker and African puff adder keychain*

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zolac_no_miko

March 2021

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