Obey Zolac!

Everyone's seen the picture of Jason Momoa's Aquaman that just came out, right? No?

GURL, TREAT YOURSELF.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

Ugggghhh, I can't go on about this enough. I thought Momoa was inspired casting when I first heard of it, but actually seeing it I am just ;ahdlfhas;kdlfja. LOOK AT HIM. LOOK AT THOSE TATTOOS.

Also, credit to Snyder where credit is due. Aquaman is as big a deal in his universe as any of the Avengers are in Marvel. And Snyder took an A-list superhero who is blond and white and reimagined him as Polynesian. He gave us a Polynesian superhero, THIS IS SO IMPORTANT.

I'm a bit wary of investing myself emotionally in the upcoming DC film franchise, since Man Of Steel was such a disappointment, but I am SO EXCITED to see Momoa's Aquaman. I AM MORE EXCITED TO SEE AQUAMAN THAN I AM TO SEE BATMAN, WHO AM I, WHAT REALITY IS THIS. (Between being excited about Aquaman and being excited about the Penguin, DC on-screen properties have me so confused about life right now.)

Also, give me all of the fanart of Emilia Clarke as badass Sea-Khaleesi Mera. I need this so bad. And give me all the fanfic of Jason Momoa!Aquaman, and quickly, before movie canon ruins everything.

...Actually, I may have that last bit covered. I've already done the groundwork for an origin story based on Aquaman's Silver Age continuity and Momoa's own half-Hawaiian background and also Hawaiian mythology and history. I'm about to go to the field for the weekend, so I very well may come back with a completed story.

JASON MOMOA, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME.

Okay so today I went to see The Amazing Spiderman and omg it was fabulous, it was so fucking charming, augh I loved it so so much. Mostly AUGH I LOVE ANDREW GARFIELD SO SO MUCH. TT_TT

I mean there's this thing about me and Spidey, okay, we go way back, he has always been and always will be my favorite superhero after Batman, and also I have had a crush on him since like before I even had hormones I think. AND I AM EVEN MORE IN LOVE WITH HIM NOW. I seriously need to see the movie again just so I can gaze at him in adoration. ♥_♥ a;sdklhgalkshdflajkshdfal;s it's just, okay, I have types that I am weak to, one of them being guys that are simultaneously adorkably fail and BADASS, and Garfield's Peter Parker (and Peter Parker in general, I guess) falls squarely into this type. I just– SO AWKWARD, but not in a horribly painful, oh-god-kill-me-now, Tobey McGuire-in-Spiderman 3 kind of awkward, awkward in an OH GOD I WANT TO RUFFLE HIS HAIR AND TAKE HIM HOME WITH ME AND CUDDLE HIM AND FEED HIM COOKIES kind of adorable way. I want to do all of those things and then have HOT HOT SEX with him, because as I said, adorkable and BADASS ohemgeeeeee he's so sexy, Gwen Stacey, girl, I totally feel you, we are both in so much trouble omg. ...Seriously it's like magic, he's awkwardly adorably unbelievably fail one moment and then the next moment BAM, MEGA PIMP, like that scene on the balcony, how does he do it?!

And I kind of loved all of the almost-but-not-quite-kissing that was somehow even sexier than actual kissing, how is that possible??

Other things:

-I was amused by the remix of Uncle Ben's famous line.

-I really should be used to this by now, I mean, it's a comic book movie for Zolac's sake but OH GOD I feel like the fail!science (including computer science) was more painful than usual. T_T

-BEST. STAN LEE CAMEO. EVER. ...OF ALL TIME.

-There were a lot of kids in the theater which I actually kinda liked, because a) they're all so noisy you don't really feel guilty for making noise, and b) they have the most entertaining and honest reactions to things, it's really refreshing. (After subway train scene, Random Kid: "THAT WAS THE BEST SCENE IN THE WHOLE MOVIE." XDDDD)

So yeah anyway the whole movie was serious in all the right places and funny and adorable in all the right places and I heart crane operators and cops and I am in love with Andrew Garfield ohmigod I will need to go see that movie again next weekend maybe.

...In other news Ben Wishaw as Richard II is Sassy Gay King Jesus, I am in love with Ovid, and Teen Wolf is dumb and adorable and totally charming, and kinda like watching Spiderman AGAIN only maybe slightly watered-down.

Okay y'all, set some time aside and read ratherastory's "But World Enough, and Time". It's a Steve/Kono AU inspired by The Time Traveler's Wife, and it's gorgeous. I don't care what you do or don't ship (I mean, strictly speaking I wouldn't say I ship Steve/Kono whatsoever), just READ IT. I don't care if you've never read anything in Hawaii Five-0 fandom in your life, or never seen an episode of the show, either; this story stands up on its own. IT'S JUST. IT'S BEAUTIFUL, OKAY, JUST GO READ IT.

...This has been a public service announcement.

And just so y'all know, you're not off the hook. I still need suggestions for my birthday Avatar marathon drinking game list. So far I've got:
-Sokka uses sarcasm
-Sokka food gag
-Aang attempts to get it with Katara
-Aang goes into Avatar state
-Zuko throws a tantrum
-Iroh food gag
-Iroh does something unspeakably badass
-Sokka does something unspeakably badass
-Cabbage Guy
-Foaming-at-the-Mouth Guy
-Another Avatar
-Singing
-Soonghi horn
-Blind jokes
-Iroh says 'tea'
-White lotus
-Specialty bending (lightning, metal, plant, blood)
-Aang dons ridiculous disguise
-Katara acquires boyfriend
-Sokka acquires girlfriend
-Someone says 'yip yip!' (THANK YOU mithen!)
-Sokka talks to his boomerang
-It is Heavily Implied that Momo is Avatar Roku

...SNAP TO IT.

Just watched H50 s02e17, "Kupale". THIS EPISODE MAKES ME HAVE ALL OF THE FEELS. I just. It had a little bit of everything I like to see in the show. To wit:

-Hawaiian history/culture.
-Hawaiian current events/politics.
-Environmental issues/Hawaiian native species.
-Steve and Danny expressing affection for each other.
-Steve and Danny bitchfighting (same thing).
-Steve and Danny living in each others' spaces.
-Easily applied Steve/Danny slash goggles.
-Danny being happy and adorable and awkward with his feels.
-TEEEEEEEAAAAAMMMM~!
-No seriously so much Five-0 Team Ohana oh my heart. (Including supporting cast! Like. All of them!)
-Steve pulling ridiculous terrifying Super SEAL stunts to catch suspects. (JESUS WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU MCGARRETT. ...NEVER CHANGE.)
-Steve driving Danny's car.
-Danny in a wet shirt WHAT I HAVE A PULSE.

Plus bonus APOLO OHNO AAHGLHSKFJASKFFSKGHSJDKFLS. Gdammit I thought he looked familiar. AND HOT. ...Since when is he doing acting? Maybe they're just running low on hapa celebrities so they just called his ass up. His very fine, Olympic speedskating, sexy ass. Unf. Although apparently he's also a Dancing with the Stars champion. APOLO OHNO DANCING YES THIS I WANT TO SEE.

TL,DR; ALSHGKA;SJGHKSLFJSGHSFSKDS. ILU H50 MY STUPID HAPPY FEEL-GOOD SHOW. T_T

Sherlock, "The Reichenbach Fall".

First I'd like to take a moment to say KATHERINE PARKINSON.

Okay, now that that's out of the way....

-JIM MORIARTY, HOW IS IT ACTUALLY POSSIBLE TO BE SO FUCKING SEXY, I JUST CAN'T EVEN. AS;LKGHALSKFJFSGHJDSK.

-MYCROFT. HOLMES'. FACE.

-MARTIN FREEMAN YOU AMAZE ME. He will be the best hobbit ever. Just by, like, default.

( OKAY SPOILERS. )

...NO SERIOUSLY HOW AM I ACTUALLY GOING TO SURVIVE???

I'm back! Sort of. It's definitely going to be a busy few days of holiday shenanigans with friends and family, but I'll at least occasionally be checking in.

O'ahu was awesome, as usual. I actually got to hang out with Maile, which, oh my god, it's been a few years. And I got to spend some time with Jen and Adam and Tommy, too, and stay up to 3 a.m. drinking Scotch and losing all my money at poker. So that was fun.

Mostly I hung out with family a lot and ate alarming amounts of food and set some stuff on fire (okay, mostly just wood, in a fireplace...and candles) and opened presents, and I bonded with an adorable teenager over Doctor Who and other nerdy things. And there was, of course, the requisite afternoon of hanging out in Pauoa with the Nerf arsenal shooting range and ping pong tournament (I think I've established myself fairly securely as the worst ping pong player in the family, although I didn't get a chance to prove myself against Nova). Aside from all of that it was a lot of quietly lounging around Granny's house, reading National Geographic and writing.

Also IT'S ACTUALLY BEEN SUNNY, HOLY CRAP. IT'S LIKE A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.

Last night Mom and I got home in time to have a light dinner and open presents with Alex (the bro, not the bf... this is just always going to be awkward) and Nova. I ended up with SO MUCH FOOD I can't even (mostly candy), and Alex and Nova got me a new camera, because they love me. I also opened the packages from look_alive and platoapproved... platoapproved sent me lollipops and Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro and a mix CD I haven't had time to listen to yet and a whole pile of Batman swag– tiny notepads! Bat symbol bracelets! foam Batarangs!– because she loves me, and look_alive sent me OMG AMAZING DELICIOUS homemade caramel and toffee and a whole pile of Trader Joe's swag (LEMUR TEEEEEEEAAAA~!! :D) and a Patrick Stump tuxedo shirt, because omg she loves me.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE~!!

Oh and I watched the Doctor Who Christmas episode last night. I was going to flail about it immediately, but there was a random blackout at, like, one in the morning that cut off my wireless signal, so I was forced to go to sleep, woe. Squee and spoilers under the cut.

( Spaceman angel with his head on backwards! )

Sooo, what have I been up to recently besides feeling like I've been punched in the face? A LOT. I shall attempt to be brief.

-The Embalmer's Ball! Friday before Halloween, awesome live music, nice dance floor, quality pupus, pirate theme!

-Went to another Halloween party the next night with the folk dance crew, had a good time but ducked out early to hang with Eric and Micah and Kira (high school friends). We drove all the way to Waikoloa to catch happy hour at Sansei's, this awesome sushi bar. Everything on the menu was half-off, and everything was delicious, and the waitress took awesome care of us and the chef made us dessert even though he usually doesn't, and it was fried ice cream and it was DELICIOUS. And then we drove to Hapuna and lay on our backs in the sand and watched the stars and the meteors and talked about movies and Micah fell asleep and the rest of us went skipping up and down the beach, and then we got back in the car and Eric opened the sunroof and drove the back roads while we stood with the wind in our faces. Didn't get home until after three in the morning, but it was so worth it.

-On Halloween went to see The Rocky Horror Picture Show for the very first time; had a lot of fun and of course Tim Curry is always sexy even/especially in drag, but all in all I think The Room is a more hilarious experience. Or maybe it's just that I'm usually drunk for that one.

-Was sick for a few days. It was sucky and lame.

-Had the most awesome day at work EVER last week Thursday. It was almost the most boringest day ever. Everyone else in the team was off in Ola‘a or Kahuku and it was just going to be me and Laurèen doing koa processing all day. This means eight hours of sitting in one spot, peeling open koa pods and stripping out the seeds. I remembered to bring my iPod and speakers, so that was a good start. And we're sitting there and we're telling each other, "Hey, we could go to the volunteer house and watch movies, that would be okay, right? It doesn't matter where we do the work so long as we do it, right? Maybe?" And then boss-lady Sierra walks by and says, "Hey girls, you should go to the volunteer house and watch movies!" and we were like, "WOW SIERRA WHAT A GREAT IDEA." And then my iPod died, so we went to the volunteer house and watched movies. And we sat in big squishy armchairs and drank tea and there were KITTENS and we watched Spirited Away, Top Gun, and Aladdin and it was the BEST DAY AT WORK EVER.

( Continued under the cut: epic adventuring, downtown dance parties, boys boys boys (okay just one), recs for fun and profit, and PICSPAM OUT THE YINGYANG. )

WHOOOOOOO GO RAINBOW WAHINE!! Probably most of the mainland male viewership is going, "Women's athletics, lolwut?" But the UH Women's Volleyball team is actually kind of a big deal over here. We're crazy about our Rainbow Wahine... they're way up there with, like, Warrior Football. It made me smile to see them written into the show!

Other things I loved about this ep:

-Danny bitching about, "Because that's what this island needs, more condos." HEAR, HEAR, DANNO, SO MUCH AGREEMENT. Also, does this mean he will have to move in with Steve now? BRING ON THE FIC.

-Ohmigod that scene with Lori and Chin was AMAZEBALLS~!! Especially DDK's face, ohmigod DDK'S FACE. ♥ ♥ ♥

-Chin rocks some hardcore Hufflepuff action. How can you say no to that puppy face??

-Steve, you are so emotionally damaged, hahaha! "I have all of these feelings and I don't know what to do, so I am going to yell a lot raaaaaaaahhhh!!!" ♥

-SLOW WALK. SLOW WALK!! I'm sorry, I fucking love this stupid show, it is just too ridiculous for words.

( Spoilers: Angela is clever, or this show is just really stupid... yeah I think mostly this show is just really stupid, although some stupid is more stupid than other stupid, less of that kind of stupid now plzkthx. )

In my actual honest-to-gods real life (*gasp*)... went to the dentist because my left maxillary second molar has been feeling tender. Good news: it's not a cavity... and I can feel good about myself, because I have never had a cavity in my life, I take really good care of my teeth and I'm glad to know this is not my fault. Bad news: I have an impacted wisdom tooth that needs to come out. [SWEAR WORDS] ...I knew this day would come... but my bottom wisdoms have been behaving so nicely! I was hoping the top ones would fall in line... DAMN YOU LEFT MAXILLARY WISDOM TOOTH! ...So I have made a couple of appointments with an oral surgeon for early November, one for a consultation on Nov 1 and then one on Nov 10 for the actual real surgery where they will have to dig through bone to retrieve the damn thing. ): HAHAHA THIS IS GOING TO BE SO MUCH FUN, GUYS.

Finally got around to watching Supernatural season opener. MISHA YOU ARE STILL MY VERY FAVORITE.

That is all.

How very fucking happy did the Hawaii Five-0 season premiere make me? VERY EXTREMELY MUCH FUCKING HAPPY, THAT'S HOW. A;LSHL;HGLKAHSLKDFHKLADSKFJLSHASKDFHKLDFDS!!

Shooooooooowww~, I missed you shooooooooooowwwww~!!! T_T

Wasn't it basically, like, everything you've ever wanted?! :DD I mean hahaha the acting is still all very laughable sometimes, and I kept figuring shit out faster than the plot could keep up, and Grace Park nice try saying "haole" and not sounding awkward about it and oh, Alex, the makeup erasing your nipple tattoo is showing but, uh, this is H50 we're talking about here, I mean, there are standards of hilarity to adhere to.

But. I mean. (In no particular chronological order.)

STEVE AND DANNY.

CHIN. BAMFEST BAMF WHO EVER DID BAMF, ALL THE FUCKING TIME, YOU ARE THE BAMFEST, ILU CHIN.

STEVE AND DANNY. PRISON VISIT. I REALLY WANTED CODE-TALK RIGHT THERE BUT I CAN'T HAVE EVERYTHING I WANT OUTSIDE OF FANFIC.

STEVE IN PRISON. LOOK AT HIS CRAAAAAZY EYES.

BAMF. CHIN. BAMF.

STEVE AND DANNY. ALL OF THE FEEEEEEEEEEELINGS.

LET'S JUST KEEP MAKING SOULFUL EYES AT EACH OTHER, STEVE AND DANNY.

YES. YES, STEVE. COMFORT YOUR BOYFRIEND. WHO IS DANNY.

DID I MENTION CHIN IS A BAMF?

ALSO KONO.

MARK DACASCOS YOU ARE STILL THE SEXIEST THING SINCE SEX. CALL ME.

LET'S DRIVE A CAR REALLY FAST. AND SHOOT PEOPLE. AND KNIFE-HAND PEOPLE IN THE THROAT.

DID YOU SEE STEVE'S RIDICULOUS SHADES?

DANNY GETS ANGRY. VERY LOUDLY. AT STEVE. A LOT.

SHOTGUN. BAMF.

SHIV!

QUICK WE HAVE A LOT TO COVER AND NOT MUCH TIME, HOW QUICKLY CAN WE RESOLVE THIS PLOT? MONTAGE!!

STEVE AND DANNY, REALLY, YOU'RE NOT FOOLING ANYONE.

AND CHIN IS A BAMF.

LONGBOARDS FOR ALL~!

...I want shave ice with azuki bean now! DD: And hey, hey, why don't the bad guys ever wear bullet-proof vests? Can't they afford them?

Aside from all of that, it was REALLY FREAKING DISTRACTING that they kept filming shit in my family's backyard. I mean, Tantalus, okay, Tantalus, and then all of the shots of Kapolei with my family's still-very-shiny-and-new property on PANORAMIC DISPLAY in the background, ohmigod. I mean, okay, yes, it's a small island, but honestly if you want to film on our property just ask us, that would totally be okay with me... and probably the rest of the family, or maybe not, what does that matter. CALL ME.

Anyway.

( Okay so I would argue that none of that is actually spoilers, but this shit totally is. )

...Walp. That's all I got. I think it's enough, really.

Shoooooooooooooowwwww~, I love you shooooooooooooooooooowwwww~!!!!!!!! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥